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A Bog For Good Health, Fitness, Wealth And Success In Relationships!

Texting Back to Love

Well, well, goodness gracious me! I've just discovered a fantastic thing on the Internet -- one of many fantastic things I've found over the years! An entire relationship program designed to help men and women get back together. Yet, that's right! To mend the fences, to heal the wounds, to breach the divide -- to get back together after you've broken up with the one you thought you could be with forever....

Or maybe you didn't think you were going to be together forever? Who knows?

Truth is, no matter whether you thought you were going to be together forever, or for a night, a week, a month, or a year, the pain can still be quite awful and grab you unexpectedly when you break up.

So you want to listen & learn about it, right?

Good. I happen to have an answer for you!

My answer is the fantastic thing I discovered - a program on the Internet, an online program, something you can buy on the Internet quite cheaply, by Mike Fiore, called Text Your Ex Back.

This guy is a self-styled relationship guru. I don't mean that disparagingly, I'm just stating a fact. He's written quite a few relationship programs, with titles that are very compelling -- "text the romance back", "text your wife into bed", and so on.

As you can see, he sticks to a certain formula here -- Text Your Ex Back is third in a series of three.

No! I am NOT joking about this, because I think it's great -- it's based on principles of emotional intelligence -- listening skills, openhearted communication, lack of manipulation, honesty and decency, moral values such as respect, honoring and love.

Video - Text Your Ex Back

Powerful stuff, yes? Yes powerful stuff indeed, and no wonder, because this guys is a relationship expert, and he knows what he's talking about.

We all know the stages of grief -- the stuff that happens when we go through relationship breakup. Disbelief, anger, grief, and acceptance, then finally recovery -- something to read more about if you've broken up!

So - as we're all programmed to go through these things it's no wonder we kind of accept the ending of relationship as being the "once and for all" ending.

Not many of us, I think, fight to keep relationships going, but maybe we should. Maybe the truth is that a relationship isn't over till the fat lady sings, as the cliché has it, which in this case might be till somebody screams "I never want to see you again!" at you, very loudly, and very angrily.

Although, to be truthful, I'm not sure you could even take that as a final expression of "The End".

Maybe that's just what angry people do when they break up with their ex-boyfriend or the ex-girlfriend..... all the while knowing that actually, deep down, they really want to get back together with them.

I am not joking about this, because I know the pain -- this is something everyone has been through. It's not pleasant, fact it's very unpleasant.

It's unpleasant because we project onto our partner all the wonderful qualities that we would like them to have, and we also project onto them all the disparaging, despicable, negative properties that we cannot face in ourselves. End result: we blame our partners for the failings that we actually bring to the relationship.

And of course, because those are things we can't accept about ourselves, there tends to be a game of "uproar" played out - not just at the end of a  relationship, but  often all way through a relationship.

Some people get off from playing uproar. Other people get off from playing "poor me". Some people get off on playing "ain't it awful". You probably know the kind of thing I mean. If you don't, you can read about it here.

So where am I going with this? Well I'm going to a place of recommendation -- a place of recommending a program you can buy online called Text Your Ex Back by Mike Fiore. Oops, I realize I just mentioned that already, higher up this post.

And I make no apologies for it, because like I said, I think it's a great way to men and women to learn something about good communication. You know the skills good communication -- maybe -- but how often do you use them? (And if you can't even remember what I'm talking about, then you probably don't use them that often: they are, in no particular order, reflective listening, observing body language, verifying the meaning and reflecting back, empathizing, keeping quiet, being nonjudgmental, being non-critical, and keeping your emotions to yourself.) Read more about those juicy things here!

Big stuff, powerful stuff, the stuff of true communication, and probably ultimately the stuff of true love. Let me just ask you one simple question to end this brief post -- If Text Your Ex Back was genuinely a way to learn how to communicate better with your partner, so that break-ups needn't even happen, would you seriously investigate it? Would you investigate it at all, in fact? See if you would.

The Adonis Golden Ratio

The Adonis golden ratio is a physiologically sophisticated diet plan suited to male biology, which matches male nutritional and physiological requirements perfectly.

It's been written by John Barban, who is an expert in sports science and nutritional physiology, using experience gained over 20 years of personal development and university training.

Video - John Barban

Barban himself freely admits that in his own history he attempted to modify his body shape by using steroid drugs, simply because that was the widely excepted system at the time -- however when you read an account of his experience (click here), you're likely to very quickly conclude that the use of anabolic steroids for bodybuilding is a route to nowhere and should be avoided.

Now most of us will probably just want to obtain a body which looks aesthetically pleasing and allows us to do a moderate amount of exercise without running short of breath or having a cardiac arrest!

But even the more modest weight loss goals, when combined with body toning goals, require an exercise regime that implies discipline, application, and a certain amount of self-confidence and in particular motivation.

Indeed, it appears that lacking motivation is the main reason why most dieters fail to achieve their objectives, and it seems probable to me that when you are in a community of like-minded individuals who can support you and offer feedback, as well as providing helpful tips, information and advice, you're much more likely succeed in your weight loss objectives.

And what are those weight loss objectives likely to be? Well for men, any where between 10 and 20% body fat, and for women, between 20 and 35% body fat seems to be a reasonable objective, but it's wise to use the calculators you can find online to work out exactly what your particular body fat percentage should be before you start to set your goals and in turn develop your exercise program.

What Barban has achieved is difference. He has written a program for women called the Venus Factor [ ] and a program for men called the Adonis Golden Ratio [ ] which actually achieve exemplary status in the rather shady and exploitative world of body toning and fitness training.

Sure, they are diets, and they're also exercise regimes, but what marks them out as different is the fact they are attuned to male and female physiology -- they're not "one size fits all" plans which, to be honest, simply don't work. It doesn't require a review by university trained physiologists to know that men and women are different in many ways: not just emotionally, but physically as well, because the female body is expected to have much higher percentage of fat than a male body.

You can see what a lean male body looks like in the picture below.

Adonis Index and fat comsumption

And although that's a simplistic observation, what it tells us is that the ways in which men and women can lose weight will be significantly different, and you wouldn't really expect to find a diet plan that succeeds for men working equally well for women.

And so it transpires: Barban has written the Venus Factor for women specifically with the objective of harnessing leptin resistance -- or, rather, finding a way to avoid the inhibiting effect of leptin resistance - which most diet plans for women do not even mention.

You see, leptin is the hormone which regulates the amount of fat deposited in the body, but in women there is often a degree of leptin resistance which prevents the hormone having its physiological impact at the level of the cell membrane.

As a result, women who strive to lose weight by seeking to inhibit their calorie intake find that they do not lose weight from their fat reserves, but often lose lean muscle tissue - their own body protein. Barban has found some ways of making it easier for the body to metabolize fat by overcoming leptin resistance, and he exploits those characteristics of his physiologically-based diet to the full - that's why the Venus Factor for women is so much more successful than most other diet plans on the market.

Now, I'm not suggesting for a moment that the Venus Factor is a simple solution to losing weight: as we all know, considerable exercise and a great degree of discipline is involved in all plans of this kind. What I am saying, however, is that for those women who find it difficult to lose weight, and who are serious about the possibility of engaging in an exercise regime on a regular basis, the Venus Factor probably does represent one of the most significant steps forward in popular dieting technology for a very long time.

Indeed, I would like to guide you to particular website which I think sums it all up clearly. Have a look at this, and you may find the answers to any questions that you have around exercise physiology and dieting techniques: - rather good, yes?

For men, I think the problem is rather different: possibly not a lack of motivation, but certainly the same insidious difficulty around losing fat -- but for men, the answer is not to find a way to overcome leptin resistance, but rather it's all about finding a methodology which allows steady and slow progress by burning fat through exercise.

Video: Fat burning and exercise

Regrettably of course this means restricting calorie intake, and here is the issue I think fazes men the most: that motivation can waiver when you're faced with the prospect of restricting calorie intake. (Which means restricting alcohol intake, meat intake, fat intake, and all the good things that fall into those categories! Things like ice cream, cheese, beef burgers, chips, crisps, french fries, biscuits, cookies!)

Well, you know the list of dietary items that are forbidden as well as I do when you're trying to lose weight!

So I think a good way from men to overcome difficulties like this is to feel they are part of a community of supportive individuals -- and nothing could be clearer than the fact that there is a supportive community around the Adonis Golden Ratio. The Adonis Golden Ratio is John Barban's unique and individualized program for men who wish to lose weight -- it sounds rather similar to the Venus Factor for women, but in fact the truth is it's very different. (Look at the calories in different foods here!)

Certain elements of the program have been transferred across, such as the supportive community which people report finding extremely helpful in maintaining motivation -- and even in fact finding a workout buddy who can act as an accountability partner when going to the gym. (Or perhaps that should read when not going to the gym!)

For those of you who are not familiar with the principles of accountability, it's not much about having a partner take responsibility for ensuring that you stick to your exercise regime, but rather more about adopting a mutual relationship in which your partner can invite you to hold yourself accountable for your failure to keep your commitments to your exercise regime.

There's a well-known accountability process which goes through several questions, the object being to help somebody understand more clearly why they're not fulfilling their commitment.... in this case, following the program of exercise that the Adonis Golden Ratio program specifies:

  • Have you broken a commitment?
  • What was the commitment that you broke?
  • What do you make more important?
  • Is that the kind of man you want to be?
  • What kind man do you want to be?
  • What's the belief you hold about yourself that means you preferred not to keep your commitment?

These are salient questions when your motivation collapses, because they get to the heart of the issue about what "takes over" in your priorities when you're faced with challenges or difficulties.

Video - dieting motivation

Generally speaking people will come up with excuses when asked why they didn't keep a commitment: it takes a life of ruthless honesty and complete integrity to acknowledge that, in actual fact, the real reasons why we do not  keep commitments and dieting weight loss are because we hold beliefs about ourselves that get in the way of success.

These beliefs might include things like, for example, "I never succeed at anything I try". Or perhaps, "there's no point trying to lose weight, because it won't make any difference to my life."

Clearly those are shadowy beliefs which have no basis in reality, but you're much more able to see what's going on when you have an accountability partner who can challenge you when you fail to keep your Venus Factor or Adonis Golden Ratio commitments. Check here for motivation tips!

And yes, you're quite right, I did say the Venus Factor or Adonis Golden Ratio commitments. That's because an accountability partner is an essential part of the process for both men and women. It behoves us all well to remember that what we might regard as personal weakness is probably nothing more than behaviors that emerge from unconscious beliefs about our capacities and abilities.

What I'm trying to get across in this section is the fact that it's a great help to have an accountability partner.

It's even more helpful to be part of a vigorous and dynamic community which engages actively both in person and on email, as well as by Skype, to ensure that all of its members are given the maximum chance of achieving their weight loss objectives in either the Venus Factor or The Adonis Golden Ratio - both of which offer supportive  communities that are extremely amenable, decent, helpful and polite, and  which can help people to maintain the commitments they set up when forming an exercise plan - no matter what their goal - perhaps, for example,  trying to lose 12 pounds in 10 weeks. Yes - IT CAN BE DONE!